(sketch from http://allfivesisters.wordpress.com)
it's been difficult - when you're not appreciated, when you're ignored, when you don't know if your existence is really necessary. I've always depended on others, on the energy of my friends, on the support of my peers, on the beliefs of my elders. Doing something solely for myself feels foreign, I'm not at all used to it. And I don't like it. Words of encouragement, responses to my actions - I need them to such an unhealthy extent. I don't want them. I need them.
you blatantly cut me out - your actions are not at all subtle. you did not tell me to my face directly, but hinted it in the most exposed way possible - in front of everyone. you already act as though I don't exist. I needed some sense of assurance but I got none. and many tell me that life is hard, and you've got to take what gets thrown at you, but I can't. You guys don't need me here, obviously. And you guys would probably be better-off without me, so why am I still here?
I feel like a burden - a waste of your time, a waste of his time, a waste of everyone's time. And no matter how much I try, nothing's going to change. I got you scolded, I never wanted that - I swear, and I don't want these things to carry on happening just because of me. You don't deserve it. It's not fair, and it's all my fault.
I'm losing my purpose. And only thing keeping me here are the people. But if I begin to cause harm to those who matter, maybe the smarter conclusion would be to bid farewell.