mixed feelings

hmm this is tough.
man what do you do when you can't say it out, neither can you put it in words?

SINGGGGGGGGG 8D

no but really, what do you do when there's nothing you can do or say? This is tough and sort of painful. Maybe i'll write it all out and bury it into the sand tomorrow at ecp. I can't explain what I'm feeling either 'cause I don't exactly know it myself and it's such confusing crap i'm not even kidding. Argh gosh what did I do wrong this isn't my fault is it? I read in my chinese p2 homework yesterday (lol) "改变别人不如改变自己" so should i, change myself instead? But I don't know what I have to change because it seems like everything I do doesn't end up fine/right/well/good/normal.
I'm really really not good enough for anything/anyone. This sucks. Life sucks. Or maybe just, I suck HAHA.
I feel so tired what do i doooooooooo sigh )-: